Mental Health Break - Dear Luna

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Dear Luna,

Travelling has always been seen as something spectacular online. Before my Asia trip, I watched many TikToks of people's travels and envied how amazing it all looked. However, I think we are forgetting about one little thing, and that is not everything we see online is what is happening in reality. Social media has hypnotized us all into believing the people we are following are living how they do all the time. But that is not true one bit, and I, for one, can agree with that. Pictures I have posted online about my travels have people liking them and stating how much they wished they were able to do something like this. But, the truth is, my body is feeling down and wants to spend the day inside, and I will listen to it.

I knew this was going to happen, it happens all the time around this time of year ever since 2018. Technically, it is PTSD as the memory of what my body went through starts to shut down during the 24th-26th, but I have never been to a therapist and therefore have not been diagnosed with it. 

I wasn't too sure about writing this, but I've come to a realisation that one way to help me go onto the next step is by writing about my feelings. There is a difference this time, people might read about this, and might question what happened to me five years ago for me to still be suffering a few times a year. But I think, allowing strangers to read this blog will make them not feel alone and know that other people have either gone through the same as them and understand the importance of listening to yourself and having a day off to regain your mental health. 

What happened to me is something that has happened to many people, especially women or people who are fem-looking. It's something that most likely made many people not be able to look at themselves in the mirror, and if they could, they were not able to see themselves anymore but instead were seeing a ghost. And, yes, with each year, it does get better, you grow, but then you have that one day and feel everything has gone back and you are there once again and you can't help but think, it will never change. 
I think it does, sure you might never understand why this happened, but you do learn to understand what happened. On top of that, you learn to understand that as time passes most days you'll live life to the fullest but once in a while, you will have a day off for comfort and remind yourself it was never your fault and you do deserve love. 

I know tomorrow I will wake up and feel completely different, ready for the day, it has always happened this way for the past few years. Of course, in 2018, at eighteen, I didn't take much care in my second semester of university, luckily it was my first year and as long as I passed with a forty, I moved on. But being able to see how much I have grown since those days, and being able to travel right now, makes me very proud to say that I am so happy to be alive as I can experience once-in-a-lifetime opportunities. 

Before I go, there is one more thing to be said. Talk to your friends if anything has happened to you, and yes, unfortunately, there will be some who will push you away, but the good ones will stay by your side and help you carry on. 
And, remember, to listen to your body and take those mental health days.

Until next time, Luna ❤️❤️❤️

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